Always Remember the Beginning

On love, legacy and returning to what matters most

When I was getting married my Baba (what I called my dad) said to my fiancé and I “always remember the beginning.” My Baba was a man of deep faith who would often speak scripture over my life without me even knowing it - it was just the way he communicated. His words were simple yet left you thinking and wanting more counsel from him. So when he offered this piece of wisdom, I knew it carried weight.

What he meant by that is we will experience many things in a marriage, good times, challenges and everything in between. As time passes we can often forget the very reasons we fell in love with each other in the first place because life has a good way of getting in the way. So this was a gentle reminder to remember the beginning - the reasons why we fell in love with each other in the first place.

My husband and I will be married for 17 years this coming October. 17 years!! When I say I’m often shocked when I think about it because to me, it doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. Maybe that’s a good thing.

Our marriage has not always been a bed of roses because there were many thorns throughout these 17 years that pricked us both one too many times. I walked into a marriage with my husband and his two small boys (ages 5 and 7 at that time). There were so many “firsts” for me that I stopped trying to count them. Now I was a step mom navigating a blended family with an ex-wife who was not ready to be an ex-wife.

And my husband? He was marrying a fiercely independent woman who was more used to jetting off to Europe for a weekend than driving kids to baseball and football games. I had built a career that demanded spontaneity and freedom, while he needed a partner who could embrace the beautiful chaos of family life. We were both stepping into uncharted territory, him wondering if I could truly embrace motherhood, me wondering if I could trade my passport for a minivan without losing myself in the process.

But we made a commitment to each other at the beginning of our marriage that divorce is not an option. Maybe it was that declaration of covenant that we made to each other that kept things in tact, even during the difficult times.

“I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds.” - Psalms 77:11-12

I look back on our wedding with such love. It was at the Hudson Hotel in Manhattan NY. We rented out the penthouse floor because it had a beautiful deck that overlooked the Hudson River. Both John and I were working in the music industry at that time so when we made the guest list and realized we were at 500 people and not even close to being done, we decided to scale way back and make it an intimate affair with just our family and a handful of close friends. It was perfect.

In October, 25 family and close friends gathered at 5:00pm under a vanilla sky - even though rain was predicted all week - to witness us get married. I walked out to Duke Ellington’s “In A Sentimental Mood” , played by a jazz quarter while gently clutching the arm of my Baba who was decked out in black tie.

After photos and cocktails, we then all sat down to a dinner where chose individual entrees and the celebrated baker Sylvia Weinstock (God rest her soul) made my cake. It was all just beautiful.

A Beautiful Reminder

During my tenure at Martin Guitar, the oldest American acoustic guitar manufacturer, I started when the company was 178 years old. That is a lot of history, a lot of generations playing and loving their Martin acoustics. But the brand was at a crossroads when I started, losing market share to a younger guitar manufacturer.

I remember thinking one day about what my Baba had said to my now husband and I about the beginning. In a marketing meeting I told my team this:

“Sometimes you need to remind people why they fell in love with you in the first place.”

That one can never rest on their laurels and just assume people will remember because they won’t. The eyes and the heart are the greatest deceivers and will fail you every time. We built an entire campaign around this sentiment and it was a beautiful reminder to Martin’s customers and drew new customers to the brand.

Once a romantic, always a romantic

Maybe someone somewhere needs to read this and remember their beginning. Maybe I just wanted to share a love story. Maybe you need to be reminded of your worth and the dreams you once held dear.

My Baba had (and still does) a profound impact on my life. I’m thankful to have had a praying father because I know now how his prayers covered me. His wisdom about remembering the beginning wasn’t just marriage advice - it was a spiritual principle about returning to what first stirred our hearts, whether that’s love, faith, or the calling that once made us feel most alive.

In a world that profits from our forgetting, remembering becomes a sacred act. So remember, dear one. Remember your beginning.

Go forth my Muses and be the way. I’m rooting for you always.